do intensives really work?
Short answer: YES!
“Do intensives really work? Is it the upfront cost worth it? How will I know it gives long-term impact? How do I know my specific problem/issue will get resolved from just three days?”
These are all real and valid questions I’ve heard during consultations with folks who are intrigued on the intensive format for EMDR/Brainspotting therapy. I understand the hesitation with the cost as it IS an investment, and the skepticism with the whole “fast and focused” approach that intensives are usually described as. I have experienced and seen the power and transformation first hand as a therapist and client myself, which is why I am an advocate for it and offer it myself. But like I always tell my clients, let’s be realistic about our expectations. Here are a few important pointers I think everyone should hear and consider if you are thinking of doing an intensive.
It works, yet you will get what you put into it.
Just like all offerings, healers and therapists can never guarantee you results. We can give you the step by step and tell you literally everything you need to do and how to do it, but it’s YOU who has to actually implement it and put it into action. This is where I see the most fall through and the biggest reason as to why folks sometimes have difficulty leaning into the process. We do not fix your problems, we give you the tools, the space, the experience to help you fix and take the necessary steps you need too.
Surrending as a core tenet for healing.
As a trauma healer, the number one thing that allows for healing is the openness and trust in surrendering. Surrendering to reality, to the change, to the impact, to the reality, to the feelings. So much of my work, especially with my long term clients is week after week cleaning up the weeds and the chains that they put on their heart and feelings after pain. People often come to my room closed and protected from the chance of pain and heartbreak. That’s why therapy can sometimes be prolonged because we have to work through all that to even get to the core. When we surrender, we embrace the unknown and acceptance, as well as releasing the need to control. We often need to recorrect that it means giving up or being complacent, because it truly is the opposite. Surrounding is the practice of grace and compassion, it lets us ease up on ourselves which in turn extends understanding and support during the healing process.
Depending where you are at in your process, how many chains and locks you still have on your heart and soul, will also determine the impact of an intensive format on you. It still works, it may just mean a more intense (deeper transformation) experience, or a multi day trauma intensive to give time to unlock the locks on your time.
Is the upfront cost with it? Well only you can answer that. I will always say yes, because it’s an investment in yourself. It’s an investment in your hope and belief of living a life more aligned with what you seek, not with where you currently are. But of course, some people will always counter that with “of course you think that, you're the one being paid.” And it’s a logical counter, because I am. Therapeutically, healers have often been trained to see people’s willingness to invest In their healing as a reflection of the self-connection and advocacy, a symbolic way of seeing their dedication in healing themself. People who want to change WILL give it a chance, they will invest. Only you can answer the “worth it” question; but if anything, I encourage you to reframe it as “is the possibility of my healing worth it?”
I describe the intensive experience as a way that we identify and highlight the core tools and things you need in order to create long term change. The thing we know about habit making is that it takes consistent and repeated dedication to the new habit to allow it to stay for the long-term. Intensives do lead to long term impact and change, however you are the one responsible for it the second you step out of the room and finish the session. You hold the responsibility and opportunity to nurture the post-intensive you. Keeping up with your coping skills, community care, and new behaviors and actions work. Intensives (in my experience so far) often help clear out the barriers that usually keep us from taking those steps.
Something about me is that I am kind of a neuroscience and trauma brain geek. I absolutely love learning and taking about the brain structures that are impacted and have a role in the way our brain processes memories, emotions, and how it translates to the rest of our nervous system. I could spend so much time just teaching my clients about all of this, but then I realize not everyone is geeky like me. If there is one thing I wish people could know is that our brain already holds the power to help us move on, we just have to be able to tap into it. The power of these bottom-up (aka brain/body healing tools) is that we use our bodies natural and ancestral tools that have let humans exist and preserve since the beginning of time. Once we work through the defenses/locks/weeds that we build to prevent us from accessing that, we’re able to go right to the spot that let’s our natural processing and healing happen as soon as we get there. So yes, it is possible to work and receive a positive experience in three days (and less). We already harness the power to heal that we need, I just help you get back on that track in the intensive.
I really love intensives. I have felt honored to witness the change, vulnerability, and surrendering people experience in my office. It’s quite literally the most beautiful human experience and probably the reason why I do and continue to do this work. And I would be honored to help you through this experience too.
